Choti Choti Khushiyan
You know what's the most unusual sound in a Physio lecture-theater? Students cheering, that's what! That those victims of extortion could find anything to smile about within those confines of unflinchingly rigid ideals is something that's a little hard to digest... especially if you haven't had breakfast.
So there I was the other day in one of our 8 o' clock Physio lectures, trying unsuccessfully to ward off my chronic somnolence, when this sudden roar of euphoria went up and down the benches. So the others were actually awake and listening to the teacher? Hmph, traitors! That completely shattered my previously-formed hypothesis that the human ear goes into a sort of self-induced dead time when exposed to a certain number of lectures on Diabetes Mellitus. (Honestly! I've had so much diabetes in the last few days, I'm ready to go into a seizure!) So, I thought, had they finally decided to start a night school for non-morning people like me? Nah! Sudan would go nuclear before that. So what was it? "The teacher says we'll be getting the weekends off!" somebody whispered from behind. "It's going to save electricity and all, BUT WE'RE GETTING SATURDAYS OFF!!!" (This news ofcourse would pass through the Chakra of denial many times before eventually being confirmed through a text message at 11:45 p.m Friday night.)
Now normally, I would've lost no time in forming some sort of opinion about a thing like this, but among other things, judgmentalism requires huge doses of coffee. So I just sat there, completely out of sync with the mafficking crowd when a friend leaned forward and whispered, "Becharay bachon ki choti choti khushiyan!"
Arz kya hai,
Like-minded friends
who're just as bitter as you,
are a gift God bestows
on a chosen few.
If you've read the Harry Potter series, you'd probably be aware of how Dementors work. And if you've been observant enough, you might have noticed that there lies within each of us a silent Dementor - a sepulchral sentinel hovering just beneath the mushroom-cloud of our consciousness - that goes into hyper-drive when there's an over-load of happiness around you. And my ever-faithful Dementor needed no second telling. I started to think.
So that's how those Armani clad miracle workers in Islamabad plan to deliver us from the energy crises? Two weekly holidays, closing off commercial activity at 8 p.m everyday, suspension of electricity to neon signs and bill-boards (which, by the way should've been controlled from the start. Lahore looks so cheap with all those giant, revoltingly colourful uglies sprouting up all over the place) That's their big idea of a bail-out that's taken them a little more than two years to come up with? What about the effect, off weekends and early closure of commercial enterprise would have on our already frail economy? What about the thousands of megawatts that'd be lost anyway due to our inefficient transmission system? What about the noisy, fuel-eating generators that have already become part and parcel of every household? And while we're asking difficult questions, what about the complete lack of consensus on building strategically important dams, at a time when personal politics should be the last thing on everybody's minds? Have our rainmakers at Isloo given a thought to what'd happen after a few years with energy production at an all-time low and the population increasing by leaps and bounds? What of the Agriculture and Industrial sector that's being made to bear the brunt of defective policy-making? It's no rocket science that conservation and production are not mutually exclusive. Conservation (well-thought out, long-term conservation, that is) will only take us so far. It's fresh production on which our ultimate survival counts.
And while the general student body at KE rejoices in its bread and circuses, I can't help but appreciate the truth in what Mohsin Hamid writes in Moth Smoke, 'People don't believe in consequences anymore.' (It's such a nice feeling you get when you're able to relate things in books to real life. The dreariness of life when put into black and white somehow makes it seem more interesting than it really is.)
But as a friend asked me yesterday, what am I going to do about all this apart from ranting? Well, I've been thinking and I've come up with an amazingly simple solution. See, I figured out that politicians have as huge a psychic appetite for personal gratification as the common man. And what do you do if you've got loads of free time and a laptop that runs on free electricity? YOU EGOSURF!!! So you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to put the PM's name in here, so the next time the 'urge' comes over him, this particular post comes up in the search results too (ummm...along with 50,000 others!) So hey there, Mr. Yousaf Raza Gilani! If you're reading this, please note that people are counting on you to be sensible. Please do us proud for once and make some right decisions. They don't have to be anything earth-shattering. A little consideration and common sense has been known to do the trick in most cases.
You think I'm crazy? Well if you're one those geniuses who think that off weekends is the best thing to have happened at KE in a long time, I'd just say the feeling is entirely reciprocated!
9 comments
Good one! I love the way u write!I thot I'd go insane with happiness on this "free"/"complimentary/"choonga"/whatever weekend....but it's getting on my nerves now.They want to save electricity? Why dont they turn off those light-guzzling "decoration" items at the mall?build some dams?stop India from building its latest dam(The Doom Dam which'll suck us dry?)...but still...atleast the politicians have done "something"..I just hope they'd do more.
ReplyDeleteYo dude, another great one!!! :D
ReplyDeleteok so as far as my own personal pair of ears r concerned, theyve been sort of drilled to perk up at anything-in-the-world-other-than-the-lecture... so words other than our daily dose of DM r heard, received n cheered at :D
Sats off 2 save electricity!!??
s.t.u.p.i.d.!!!
Yup... what we need r dams, more efficient power transmission, an greener sources of energy. Oh n ofcourse a Captain Obvious 2 explain that 2our superb R.P.Ashraf :P
nice one yarr...:) hmm so that was the reason u wanted moth smoke at that time ...lol!
ReplyDeleteawwww...that one was a shweet one from my shweet sis:p
ReplyDeletewell honestly i love the way u write it. way to go sis..thumbs up!!
lil correction by the way...if u r following the news now a days tell me who will be the next president of pakistan??
come on brainy ones give me ur best shot....
hint...
he is the boss of ur current president:)
another superb piece of writing...!
ReplyDeleteaala=)
my first reaction was also euphoric but then on thinking some more i realized that this couldnt last for long...doctors are already protesting that workload would increase if 2 days were off...so most prolly the decision would be revoked for colleges with joint hospitals or our study hours would be increased....
say what you must but being in ke has made me a pessimist...
nice one FH yet again!
ReplyDelete@ maryam: is it ameen fahim, being the real president ov ppp????
niiiiiiicceeee!!!! As always... :)
ReplyDeleten as far as dis 'sat off' scene is concerned, well i wz over the moon at frst..but when i had to spend 2 whole days at the damn hostel..''naani yaad a gayi''...seriously!!! it sucked big time!! N come on!! this isnt a solution!! i mean u got to do sm long term planning...ryt?? next u know they'll be ordering us all to add salt instead of sugar in brownies to save sugar....increase da prod for heavens sake!!! i know its not as easy as it sounds but you've got to atleast innitiate an effort...
Hey F!So when should we expext to see you in the Parliament?
ReplyDelete@ A. Rashid: Oi! Baray log:)
ReplyDeleteYou do know, don't you that this is never getting out of the drawing room.
And I get your point. Stop being so polite and just tell me to shut up when I can't do anything but point fingers...:)